Thought Crimes

The Lyrical Terrorist should have been convicted for writing shitty poetry, rather than the contents of said poetry. Personally, I prefer her writing her twisted Jihad to the risk of me being blown up.

The Lyrical Terrorist is the second person to escape the gas chambers. Somebody send her a guide about how to write good poetry.

Time to bomb America?

Somebody really needs to do something about those damn Americans. They think that they own the world. Now they claim that they can kidnap anybody of any nationality anywhere in the world. Fuck that. I say everybody else in the world kidnaps their very own American citizen, then the rest of us can have a slave, if a slightly insane one.

Virgin Media...

Are a bunch of fucking cunts. They have overcharged me, even though I phoned them several times to complain about my bill and they promised that I would not be overcharged. Now they are refusing to pay the money back into my bank account (I need that £50 in order to eat something other than tinned tomatoes). Instead they are offering to take the money off next months bill, well next month I'll have money to pay the bill and eat, but not this month. If BT weren't so expensive I'd switch (oh wait, I was going to go with BT in the first place, they said that they would send a technician out to install a phone line and they never did). Gas chambers for the entire Virgin company (I might consider voluntary extinction for the airline, no, actually they can go to the gas chambers too - Iceland air is better) and gas chambers for BT.

Now it gets personal.

All I wanted for lunch was a tin of tomatoes with some toast. Is that so much to ask for? Well, I guess that ASDA think so. On trying to open a tin of Smart Price Chopped Tomatoes (which ASDA doesn't sell on their website), I discovered that for the third day running, the fucking tin would just not open. It is not a problem with my tin opener, because each day I used a different one. It is a problem with the tins themselves. This is not the first problem I have had with Walmart, or their shitty products and it probably won't be the last. I would shop somewhere else but as Walmart and Tesco seem intent on trying to take over the world I'm stuck with shopping at one of the two because there is nowhere else. Gas chambers for Walmart and Tesco.

Can't blame the girl...

A mother has been sent to prison for not getting her daughter to school. But can you really blame the daughter for not wanting to go? She could learn so much more by not going to school. Like instead of learning plagiarism at school, at home she could learn how to think for herself.

As for the mother, don't you think that maybe locking up a rapist would be better?

I'm not shocked...

Some discs with the personal details of families receiving child benefit have gone missing. And the government still wants ID cards. They can't be trusted with any information. Time for the gas chambers.

ID cards are the first step to micro-chipping. The state already has too much control over our lives. 300 times a day we are captured on CCTV. The state is not Mother and the state is not Father.

Those evil skateboards, children might fall.

US federal regulators are warning parents against toys yet again. Of course the more serious issue of lead paint and choking hazards came up, but there are toys out there that might cause children to hurt themselves.

Skateboards and inline skates (they forgot roller skates, I guess that bikes and ponies may come under "riding toys") may, surprise, surprise, cause your child to fall, which could be dangerous. If your child really wants that skateboard, maybe you could wrap him or her in bubble wrap before you let him or her use it.

Darts and sling slots could cause an eye injury. Well, here's some advice, don't aim for the eyes, unless it is your intention to cause eye injury.

Obviously small children put things in their mouths. Maybe parents should examine the toy themselves and then actually have to think for themselves in deciding whether or not that particular toy is safe for their child.

If you are that worried about lead paint, then don't buy products that were made in China. Kids already have way too many toys that they don't play with and that cost half a month's wages for that one toy. So please, don't buy your kids any more overpriced but cheaply made toys. Perhaps you should buy them a toy that they'd appreciate instead of what the industry is telling you to buy. Ignore this year's must-haves because they are probably a load of shite that will either be broken or neglected in the toy box by New Year's Day.